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Post by Deleted on Jun 3, 2015 21:11:01 GMT -5
We did something like this for my cousin and his wife. They live out of state so during one of our family get togethers everyone brought gifts and my aunt opened them. We recorded it and sent the gifts and stuff to them.
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Post by Giaspo on Jun 3, 2015 21:30:10 GMT -5
Can I send a gift? :-). Just kidding. I think it's weird. Are you sure your H isn't involved? Maybe he is planning some way to get you there as a surprise. Last minute romantic weekend/surprise baby moon or something similar?
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Post by ktmac on Jun 3, 2015 21:31:46 GMT -5
What the what? This is super weird.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 3, 2015 21:36:45 GMT -5
We did something like this for my cousin and his wife. They live out of state so during one of our family get togethers everyone brought gifts and my aunt opened them. We recorded it and sent the gifts and stuff to them. Okay, you're the first person who's actually been to something like this. Was it weird? How did your cousin feel about it? (This also seems less weird because it happened at another family function. The whole event wasn't built around the shower.) It wasn't that strange, but it wasnt it's own party or anything. We were having our Fourth of July thing and did it during that. My cousin loved it but she didn't know about it until she got the gifts and watched the tape so it was a big surprise for her. |
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Post by ven on Jun 4, 2015 6:20:28 GMT -5
Do the guests know you won't be there? I honestly don't think I'd go if I knew the guest of honor wasn't going to be there. I might send a present if I felt so inclined. If I thought the guest of honor was going to be there and learned otherwise when I arrived, I'd probably leave. I'm undecided what I'd do with the gift at that point.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2015 6:34:37 GMT -5
Any chance it was/is a surprise?
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Post by vk on Jun 4, 2015 8:20:44 GMT -5
I had to re read the OP a few times because it wasn't making sense to me. I thought your cousin was inviting you to her shower and she wouldn't be there. Because I thought there is no way she was inviting you to your own shower.
I think the thought behind it is sweet - coming from your mom, but it is not something I would be comfortable with (in your position). I would be upset if I was expecting to see you at the shower and it turns out you were never coming all along. But if your mom called me and was like hey lets do this for Jennylee, she won't be able to make it but show her how much we love her, etc. It would be weird, but I'd down for it as long as you and I were close. If that even makes sense.
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Post by vk on Jun 4, 2015 9:43:39 GMT -5
I had to re read the OP a few times because it wasn't making sense to me. I thought your cousin was inviting you to her shower and she wouldn't be there. Because I thought there is no way she was inviting you to your own shower. I think the thought behind it is sweet - coming from your mom, but it is not something I would be comfortable with (in your position). I would be upset if I was expecting to see you at the shower and it turns out you were never coming all along. But if your mom called me and was like hey lets do this for Jennylee, she won't be able to make it but show her how much we love her, etc. It would be weird, but I'd down for it as long as you and I were close. If that even makes sense. Yeah - but it wasn't even that. She messaged to congratulate me and ask if I knew the sex. She had no idea that I would be "in town then." so yes, LMC - I am getting the impression that NO ONE KNOWS I will not be there (or knows that I don't/didn't even know that this was happening). I've had other family members go home for their wedding/baby shower, and I'm assuming that the guests think this is the case here. ahhh okay, I read it wrong then! my bad. But still, it is an odd situation. But hopefully it will work out for the best! |
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Post by snippet17 on Jun 4, 2015 10:39:33 GMT -5
I am on mobile and can't vote but that is strange.
I been to a baby shower where the mom was not there, BUT the reason is due to the mom had the baby the evening before. My cousin's sister opened the gifts and had pictures of the baby there.
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Post by ven on Jun 4, 2015 12:06:04 GMT -5
@lolo - what a wonderful surprise!
@jennylee - please don't lose sleep over your mom's "look what a great grandma I am" party. She's the one whose going to look bad, not you. You should enjoy the irony of her throwing a party for appearances sake making her look like a fool.
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Post by snippet17 on Jun 4, 2015 16:55:18 GMT -5
@lolo - what a sweet story! And you've summed up how I feel much more eloquently than I've been able to thus far. Tonight's conversation will not be pleasant, even though I know she's going to say that it's too late to cancel. snippet17 -I have no problem with circumstances like that. Totally acceptable. My cousin's shower would have been fine if I got a thank you card. She, also, had another one a year later for her second child. |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2015 17:40:29 GMT -5
I'm still sitting here trying to figure out what could be going on...because this just seems SO illogical
Unless your mother had some way to surprise you with a trip to the location for that day and you just don't know it yet?
regardless, no matter what it isn't a reflection on YOU. You didn't come up with this idea.
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Post by Giaspo on Jun 4, 2015 20:58:29 GMT -5
Thanks ven and sarahbelle. Someone pointed out that it was really the best of both worlds - getting a shower without actually having to attend it. I know that she won't change her mind, but I also know that after it's done it will be up to me to find a way to get it all up here. Guess I need to order a serious stash of thank you notes. (again, something she wouldn't do. She's never sent a thank you note. I wonder if I was found under a rock somewhere, and raised by the wrong people...) I'm just catching up and as I was reading, I was wondering who would write the thank yous. |
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Post by kristenkay on Jun 5, 2015 9:44:13 GMT -5
This is really odd. I'd be okay with writing thank you notes once I received the gifts, but I certainly wouldn't be taking it upon myself to get the gifts to myself, especially when you don't technically 'know' about the shower since you weren't invited. I don't really have any other advice but I'm interested to see how this really pans out.
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Post by ktmac on Jun 5, 2015 9:47:44 GMT -5
@jennylee did you talk with your Mom last night?
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2015 13:03:39 GMT -5
@jennylee did you talk with your Mom last night? She wasn't home. I left a message, and it would seem that she's avoiding me right now. I'm sorry you mom is stressing you out @jennylee (((hugs))) |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2015 10:01:40 GMT -5
OMG! "but no one is coming to see you"  WTF is that supposed to be??? @jennylee - I'm so sorry. She is WAY out of line with this. Like so far out of line/over the line - she can't even SEE the line. Sending you internet hugs! |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2015 17:00:53 GMT -5
((((@jennylee))))
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Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2015 12:59:05 GMT -5
Sending you tons of hugs. Just so inappropriate. I'd like to slap your mother on your behalf for this - you should be happy right now, not stressed and upset over this sort of nonsense.
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WTF is that supposed to be???