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Post by GoneFishing on Mar 5, 2014 11:30:07 GMT -5
I know, I honestly truly know that 3 months is not a long time. But there are so many things in my life that sort of hinge on if/when I get pregnant that I'm feeling a bit like this is taking over my life. I'm not obsessing on the end of the actual conceiving, but once I get to the two week wait portion, I spend the entire time feeling like I'm in limbo.
In April, I'll either be sky diving for the first time or pregnant. I can't take Spring Break off because I might need those days for maternity leave/prenatal appointments later in the year. In May, I'll either be getting a tattoo or pregnant. Getting pregnant in March would be ideal, but getting pregnant in April through July would be hell on my job (though doable). In June or July, I'd like to do a ZombieRun...if I'm not pregnant.
And the list goes on and on. It's not that I don't want to be pregnant, its that I don't want to miss out on life for the next 6 months to a year just trying to GET pregnant, you know? I'm not even sure what this post is supposed to accomplish other than to vent and maybe get advice from others who have planned their TTC in the past (as opposed to "we'll see what happens" or happy little surprises). /whining.
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Post by NonosG on Mar 5, 2014 11:47:32 GMT -5
Oh Stage I feel for you. I don't have much else to add but I can see how this would stress me out a little.
At the moment I'm having a little freak out of my own. While we were on our honeymoon I passed out two nights in a row without taking my BC pills. Normally this would be no big deal but since we were having sex every day sometimes multiple times a day I'm now a bit freaked out. I had no intentions of getting pregnant on our honeymoon so Imm anxiously awaiting my next period.
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Post by GoneFishing on Mar 5, 2014 14:07:25 GMT -5
Thanks ladies! You're all right, I can definitely plan most of these things. Now that I think about it, the only one I might lose money on is the ZombieRun, and that would be $35 (if I sign up asap) because I wouldn't have to book a hotel until closer to time. I don't think it's a good idea to run my first race (which includes obstacles) in the Nebraska summer heat while pregnant, but everything else is easily postponed or refunded. You guys are awesome, and I appreciate you talking me down off the crazy ledge.
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Post by GoneFishing on Mar 5, 2014 17:24:34 GMT -5
I've been in the same mindspace, and we're not even TTC yet. We likely will start next year, but I've already got "But what if I want to do this? And this? And I can't fly after X, so..." through my head all the time. It's driving me crazy. It's nuts once you start thinking about all the limitations of the actual pregnancy, right? I tried to talk to my mom about it (one of only 2 people IRL who know we're TTC), and she just said "well, obviously you aren't ready to have a baby yet". Seriously, Mom? I'm not saying things like "man, if I don't backpack through Europe for 2 months and go on an African safari, my life will never be complete". I'm saying it's frustrating knowing that hopefully there's going to be this 9month period of limitations sometime around the corner, but not knowing when it will happen.
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Post by nsweare on Mar 6, 2014 9:42:35 GMT -5
I've never dealt with infertility, but my BFF dealt with it for several years and was only able to conceive via IUI. When we talked, I remember her telling me that she realized she couldn't put her life on hold anymore, waiting to get pregnant. She couldn't put off planning trips with her husband, or doing home renovations, etc because it was just too hard. It was a constant reminder of her empty uterus. Once she stopped worrying about the "what if I'm pregnant" stuff, she started to feel a little more normal. Obviously, there was still some planning involved when medical intervention was necessary, but she really liked still having things, like trips, to look forward to. I know you're really early in the process of TTC, but if you have questions or need info about fertility treatments, I'd be happy to relay any info she may have to you. Though you probably won't need it
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Post by snippet17 on Mar 6, 2014 9:58:45 GMT -5
It's nuts once you start thinking about all the limitations of the actual pregnancy, right? I tried to talk to my mom about it (one of only 2 people IRL who know we're TTC), and she just said "well, obviously you aren't ready to have a baby yet". Seriously, Mom? I'm not saying things like "man, if I don't backpack through Europe for 2 months and go on an African safari, my life will never be complete". I'm saying it's frustrating knowing that hopefully there's going to be this 9month period of limitations sometime around the corner, but not knowing when it will happen. AGREED. Especially when we want to plan fun things. Like a one year anniversary trip (YES, we're not even married yet. I like to plan). Can you imagine booking a trip in January for March, getting pregnant in late January, and having terrible morning sickness? Oh hooray, I'm in Italy and barfing my brains out in the hotel. I just want to know when it'll happen and how I will feel!! This is why H and I are waiting until after our trip in November to start to TTC. I think of other things, too. Such as well I am not pregnant now and might be fine to play flag football, but what about in a few weeks, etc. There is a nice gab between flag football in the winter, so hopefully I would be pregnant before the spring season started.
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Post by ktmac on Mar 6, 2014 11:46:47 GMT -5
i'm on this crazy train too
i have to schedule a surgery at some point to get the pins in my leg taken out and obviously I can't do that if I get pregnant. it's a weird balance between wanting to get pregnant and wanting the pins out. I am scheduling drs. appointments during times in my cycle that I wouldn't be pregnant (like, during my period or right after) so I don't have to worry about x-rays and stuff, but overall it's like ... I'd rather be pregnant and wait for the surgery. But while I'm waiting to get knocked up why not just do it?
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Post by kwith on Mar 9, 2014 10:13:46 GMT -5
I'm late to the game and all the advice is good. The only other thing I'll add in response to your OP, Stage, is that it's not like TTC is a game without an off-switch. I don't think you should put your life on hold to do it, but you can put it on hold to live your life. If getting pregnant April-July would be difficult on your job, use condoms and don't TTC during those months. You can pick right up again at the end of that time. Same thing applies if you just want to take a month off for tattoos or to drink everything you want. There will be plenty of time for life restrictions once you're pregnant / the baby arrives.
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