Cycle 1, CD33 with a BFN yesterday- I was on the pill right up until we hopped on the train so no idea what my average cycle length might be, I do recall it being a bit long as a teenager. I haven't started temping but BD'd on CD12,15, and 17 so it's not out of the realm of possibilities but using the fancy digital one on CD32 and getting a no doesn't have me hopeful, I'll use another dollar store one Saturday if I'm not spotting by then.
Things are still crazy but I'm going to make an effort to be on here more, I miss you ladies!
CD1, I'm slightly disappointed but know it doesn't mean anything and now I have a better idea of my cycle length. I was mostly hopeful since my sister got pregnant her first month off. On the bright side I can drink at our dinner party tonight.
CD1, I'm slightly disappointed but know it doesn't mean anything and now I have a better idea of my cycle length. I was mostly hopeful since my sister got pregnant her first month off. On the bright side I can drink at our dinner party tonight.
Hey loves. In my clinic waiting for blood work, which I've had every day since last Monday. My stomach is bruised and sore and I am so tired. Needless to say, I'm pretty tired of the needles. Follicles looked really good yesterday, needed to grow a bit more. Hoping to trigger tomorrow or Wednesday.
I now get a call that my estrogen level shot up 50% to almost 4900. Now they're telling me there's a 95% chance I'll have to freeze everything and can't do a fucking transfer this month. Great, because we had NOTHING that survived to freeze last time. because I could have fucking OHSS.
Because not one fucking thing can do right, can it? I don't even have that many viable follicles. But I have a million little ones and they're all producing E2.
((LMC)) This is brutal. My heart is hurting for you.
Do they think that you have OHSS? Have they checked your HCG levels?
I'm just so sorry. I want to wrap you in a big, comfy blanket and give you tea and hugs.
I think I'll know more today. I have to change triggers to Lupron to try and avoid OHSS.
I am exhausted. I cried the whole way home from my appointment this morning. My veins have had enough. Most of them are scarred even though I'm switching arms every day. She went for the one, it started, then immediately stopped because it's so scarred up. They got it going again and then apparently it didn't want to stop because after they bandaged me up, I got up and blood immediately started running down my arm. I'm just at the end of my rope. It hurts.
I should know what's going to happen around 100 this afternoon. But the nurse told me it's a 95% chance I'll have to do a freeze, so I'm pretty well convinced that I'm fucked. The universe is screaming at me and I don't know how much longer I can fight it.
What you're going through is horrible. It's not fair and it sucks. And I'm so sorry you have to do this. I think @daubachsgirl23 gives some good advice about maybe talking to someone. When life gives you lemons, a therapist can help give you tools to cope. You're in my thoughts and just keep reminding yourself that you just have to put one foot in front of the other. That's it. Just make it through today, and tomorrow you can deal with tomorrow.
Thank you guys. I of course like the idea in theory, I'm just concerned of how effective it would be for me. My mom is a talker. J is DEFINITELY a talker. I'm more of a silence and eventually sleep it off. I hate talking about this stuff, and it's not just not wanting to talk about it - I have nothing to say. It's hard to describe.
Just got confirmation that we're going to have to do a freeze all, which of course in my mind means we're fucked. nothing made it to freeze last time, why would it this time? So we may have gone all through this for nothing. And honestly, if that's the case, I'm not sure I can do it again.
Text book answer is that follicles gross 2mm per day. Mine were growing at 1, at best. Since Sunday, one has grown SEVEN. Another SIX. They've fucking exploded. My estrogen went up almost double.
My body doesn't want this. It's never going to cooperate.
I will say, talking to a therapist is different than talking to other people. You don't just talk at them. They engage back and give you tools to help handle things. It's a different experience (In my experience anyway). It might be worth doing one appointment and seeing how you feel afterward. If it doesn't work for you, it's an hour of your life wasted. Or it could work great and you'll be glad you did it. Just my 2 cents anyway.
I agree with @jennylee therapy is not for anyone. I know for me I have seen multiple therapist and within the last year went to support groups to see if that would work. None of it has for me.
Writing, punching bag, crying have all worked better for me but everyone is different.